Musical Chairs 2: Musical Scandals

SY is my good friend.
It's a bit hard though, because she is a musical prodigy.
I am your run-of-the-mill person who sucks at playing music. And yet I stuck in the orchestra and band for this long... because next year I get to go to an amusement park in a competition for these two musical groups.
Unless, like many others in that grade, I get disqualified because I suck too bad at the music and I might embarrass them. Which, at any rate, has a good chance of happening since I haven't practiced since like the sixth grade.
Not even kidding.
But anyway... this year, there were a LOT of competition rejects. So the band had a whole bunch of additions for people in my grade to see if anyone was good enough to make the cut. And get to go to the amusement park.
I was surprised at how many people signed up to try out. They all made it. When a whole bunch of kids in a grade younger than yours can beat you out of a competition, it says something about your playing. Such as: YOU SUCK.
Ah, yes. I am sooo nice.
Anyway, the night of the concert, the conductor stopped the band in the year ahead of us and said to the audience, "And now, we will have some band members from the grade younger join for a piece called, 'Le Cirque du Solais.'" It was something weird and Frenchy circusy like that. Anyway, they got up and I said hopefully quietly enough that just my friends could hear: "Look at those losers! They think being good at stuff makes you cool."
And afterwards, he introduced the rest of us so we could come up and play. He may as well have said, "Introducing the losers who weren't good enough for the rest of us."
Thank you, maestro, for that marvelous introduction.
Anyway, the time came for the orchestra (yes, I am also in the orchestra) to test for the seating chart. I was currently fourth chair cello and SY was currently third chair first violin. She's like also in a separate orchestra outside of school and practices like an hour every night. So she should probably be first chair.
Apparently, a lot of people think the seating arrangement is screwed up.
Personally, I think we should all just accept that we suck. I mean, I've accepted the fact that I am behind someone who is deaf. Nothing against people who are deaf, but he can't hear what he's playing and he's still better than me. :D Oh well!
Oh and ballet is musical, isn't it? Semi? At least? Anyway, I take ballet classes on Tuesdays and I've come to dread them. I mean, you know that stereotype that ballet teachers are all evil Russians? It's not a stereotype. They are seriously all Russian. And evil.
And the bottom of your feet get really gross. Like, I'm not even joking.
AC does ballet and she is REALLY GOOD. She came in to school with her point shoes once.
Yep, this is the gossipiest gossip EVER.

No, NOOOO!! That tickles! Down, Smitty Warbenyagermanjensin!!!!*

Hello... guess who had to drag herself unwillingly out of bed this morning after a long Memorial Day Weekend of partying (cough, watching television)?
Me. That's who, idiots.
And guess who proceded to have one of the worst academic days of her life?
DR. SEUSS!!!!!!!!! No, idiots, it's me again.
I failed a thing in math. And so right now, my average is like a C minus. And that is bad. And I'm afraid to tell my dad because he will be P.O.d. Like, really, really, really P.O.d. And it's going to suck. Really, really badly.
So anyway, you don't want to sit here and listen to be drone on and on about my epic failure, do you? (If the answer is yes, then please proceed to the self-check-out lane at the ACME. You will find me there, in a pathetic and frantic attempt to bag stuff when the machine is yelling at me to put the bag down and then pick it up again.) YOU are here to read something about somebody else... no one in particular, just someone who did something stupid.
So what even happened today???
Alright, I know a couple posts ago I talked about how MK was going out with BC (if you missed it, not only are you lazy, but you're lucky because here's a link):
http://sofiasez.blogspot.com/2008/05/so-guess-what.html
Anyway, I was talking to HH today about it and so she said that she was the first one to know about it. Which is understandable, because she hangs out with BC a lot. Alright, moving to the present tense because I hate writing in past tense:
"Wait... don't you think it's weird that BC's going out with MK?" I ask HH.
"Not really... they've liked each other since last year. BC told me," HH replies.
"Wait... BC told you that?" I ask. I guess it would make sense... HH sort of follows BC around during class. Just saying. He might get annoyed and tell her something like that... or maybe he's actually friends with her and just told her something personal because that's what friends do. Naaahhh... God, I hate psychology.
"Yeah, he also told me something else that was a secret but now it's kind of out so I don't really have to keep it secret anymore," HH says.
Oooohhhh. This should be good.
"So, BC's been planning since like January to ask MK out on her birthday and then when the time came, he started to chicken out and I had to drag him down to the chorus class with [friends's name here... I forget who it was] and we made him wait around till after class to ask her out."
I assume she said yes, otherwise this whole conversation might not be happening right now. Who am I kidding, HH would be dying to tell someone about BC's rejection had conversation gone wrong. I would probably know already, actually.
"Awwwwwwwww," I offer up. What the heck else am I supposed to say? Ew, she should have said no, I hate BC? That probably wouldn't have been wise, what with HH being friends with BC and all. "... But don't you think it's weird?" I still say. "Because... MK's so nice." Uh-oh. I stop then, not trying to relive the conversation with AE at the gardening thingy.
"What do you mean?"
"Well, no offense, but BC's kind of a jerk."
"Well, I guess who goofs off a lot, but he's a good friend."
Goofs off. Not exactly the phrase I was looking for. And I was under the impression that MK and BC were more than "friends."
Oh well. I drop the subject and get back to my classwork.

*About the weird title... it really has nothing to do with the post. I just figured the incoherent babbling would draw you in. And if you're wondering where I got the name, it was from a Spongebob cartoon. And then we saw the Golden Compass and the polar bear's name was pretty close to the name I typed, so now my dad jokes he's going to move to Alaska for retirement and make friends with an alcoholic bear named Smitty. If you don't get the alcoholic part, see the movie. You will feel ripped off but hey, you'll understand about the alcoholism reference.

Live from Suburbia, it's Saturday Morning!!!!!!

In case you have been living in a cave for a while or simply have no sense of humor, I will explain the title: After the opening sketch on Saturday Night Live, a cast-member/guest star will shout, "Live from New York it's SATURDAY NIIIIGHT!" and then everyone screams and applauds. I was hoping maybe you'd scream and applaud, but looking at my poll on the side, there doesn't seem to be too many people even reading this right now... lemme check how many: Ah, yes. Zero. Zip. Goose egg. None.
OH WELL!!!!! I CAN DEAL WITH IT!!!!!!!!!!!!
So let me tell you what happened this morning:

• I slept in as late as possible (a.k.a. 9:25, which is relatively early for a teenager who would sleep in till three if she had the chance)
• I was woken up by my dad who asked me to put my sister's hair up for her ballet class. It's mandatory that they wear their hair up and my dad's fingers are not as nimble as mine--one time he tried to put my hair up and I was crying for the next hour--so he had me do it. RD (my little sister) decided that she would make things as hard for me as possible so I had to put her hair up while she was lying on the floor. And that little five year old has so many knots in her hair you would not believe.
• My dad realized that he has absolutely no idea where RD's ballet and tap shoes are so we go on a long search, and where it not for my chivalry in dragging myself out of bed and searching for it also, they would have gotten to class at least half-an-hour late.
• My dad thanked me, dragged RD (who was begging him to let her paint Sella's face. Sella is her favorite doll which my dad got her when he went to Amsterdam) out the door, and promised me he'd have bagels when he returned.
• I decided to reward myself for finding the shoes by eating a whole bunch of chocolate ice cream for breakfast. Of course he wasn't there to witness it so he'll just have to be guilty about not rewarding me. (Note: Have you ever found it more effective to eat ice cream with a fork? I definitely have.)
• I went online, and as my homepage is AOL, I saw that there was a celebrity trash gossip link so I went there. And lemme tell you, you would not believe some of the faces that People Magazine thinks are gorgeous. These people are kind of ugly. And People put them in the 50 most gorgeous. How dare they invade that coveted spot.
• Then I went to my blog and the rest is history.

Alright, this is supposedly a gossip blog, so what gossip is there...
Okay, I got some.
I was not present at this place, but when talking with JM he enlightened me as to how it went. He seemed pretty proud of it actually, but when he shared with me what actually happened, I didn't understand why he was so happy about the following events.

So, JM is over at his friend RC's house with JB and MP. RC is sort of popular and doesn't have the best judgement or the nicest personality, but if he reads this and is offended, he can feel free to prove me wrong. JB hates me and thinks I'm a total dork, and I am fine with both of these accusations. MP basically shares JB's ideas, and that's fine too. Everybody is entitled to their own opinion.
... Even JS, that guy who called me an ugly b**** who makes bad jokes. To which, I am still laughing about.
Ha, ha, ha.
So RC says to his posse, "Oh my God. Let's go to FR's house."
FR is a popular girl in my class who is pretty nice as far as popular girls go. However, being one of the only two popular girls in our class, most guys have a crush on her and it probably sucks since most of the guys at my school repulse me.
JM, JB, and MP are all like, "Whatever," so they go. Yaaaay. This is a fascinating story, isn't it?
So they show up at FR's house and FR is up on her porch and she shouts, "Stay away, you stalker rapists!"
Yes. That is exactly what she said.
And naturally, all the guys keep walking up the driveway, paying no heed to her demand.
"If you come one step further, I'll set my dogs on you!" FR shouts.
FR has two bulldogs, according to JM. Ugly things, true, but unless their rabid, I wouldn't say that they're the most vicious dogs in the world. You want to get rid of a guy like RC? My advice to you is to get a couple of dobermans.
"Awwww, bull dogs are so cute," RC says.
So FR shouts in through her front door, "They came!!! Help!!!"
And this guy with a bat apparently runs out the front door.
Naturally, this is a little bit more threatening than a pair of bull dogs, so RC, JM, JB, and MP start running. But in the end, the guy with the bat runs right by them and says, "See ya."
Didn't see that one coming. You can't exactly call it self defense if all they were doing was being on your driveway.
Then again, maybe you could... I'm no lawyer.
So, that is my gossip for now. Hope I entertained you.
Oh, and by the way: my dad and RD walked in the door twenty minutes ago. Ballet was canceled. However, that did not deter them from getting bagels.

There is Stinging Nettle Up MY NOSE!

I'm going to make this post short and sweet.
Today, my class went down to the Delaware to pull up invasive plants from the side and hopefully make the environment better.
There were two different invasive plants: something that had something to do with mustard and stinging nettle. I pulled up a whole bunch of mustard stuff, was taking a break, and fell face-first into some stinging nettle.
Stinging nettle is like poison ivy, but it doesn't just itch, it also tingles like your hand/foot/face is asleep, and obviously, it stings.
So it's worse.
And landing on my face, I got it on my face, on my hands, on my neck, and, of course, up my nose.
The less inconvenient itches have all ceased to exist but the up the nose itch is still there because when you are in school, you tend to try not to pick your nose.
But it's definitely there.
And it hurts.
And it's undignified to itch the inside of your nose.
EVEN IF IT HURTS.
WHICH IT DOES.

It's amazing what you can learn...

Yesterday, I dared ER to go say something stupid (I won't say what it was, but there were no curses in it and it sounded relatively dumb and mildly insulting but mostly confusing) to JS. He went and shouted it at JS even after I said I was kidding and didn't want him to. But, of course, like all guys, he refused to listen and I was running home as I heard him shouting it. I was really embarrassed and freaked out and the next day I asked EW what happened.
So... I like writing in the present tense, let's write it that way:
"ER! What did he say?" I shout. ER does not respond; he keeps walking towards the apartment where he lives. Okay, looks like this will require expert probing.
I start to run. He doesn't seem to notice, and KD and MS are also chasing him. We catch him and I ask again, "ER!!!! What did JS say???? Come on!!! Tell me!!"
He's not answering.
We grab his backpack and hold it hostage.
"ER, spill, or the backpack gets it."
"NO!" ER shouts. "Give it back!"
KD gets a bit carried away and starts chasing him again, even though he's about two yards in front of us and making no sign of attempting escape. No wonder. We have his backpack and his homework. He actually cares about his grade.
"Watch it! You're getting dirt on my new shoes!" ER says angrily to KD. Woooowww... ER is a little grumpy. MS decides that it's not worth finding out what happened with JS and heads home. KD is a little more persistent, however, and stays along with me.
"What did he say?!" I ask again.
"Look! I don't want to tell you because he said something really mean!"
Oh, wow. I really like where this is going.
Suddenly, I'm not so interested in what happened. "Okey dokey, here. Take back the backpack... I don't need to know what Mr. Jerkface said about me anyway." Well, I kinda do, but not enough to feel sad about it afterward.
KD is a little interested though, and as I drop ER's backpack at his feet, KD puts her foot on it and says, "You don't get it back until you tell me what JS said."
ER groans and says, "He said Sofia was an ugly b**** who made bad jokes."
HA!
That's the big deal?!!!? He called me the b word? And ugly? And that I make bad jokes?! I'm almost insulted that that was the insult! I can handle that! I get called a b**** on a daily basis. And I'm not super popular, so I don't expect a jock like JS to find me aesthetically pleasing. Not that I would really care. The dude is so emo, I have seen him smile like twice in this lifetime, and I've known him since third grade. He doesn't seem to be very happy, and I don't take life advice from someone who can't even satisfy themselves.
... And I make bad jokes????
Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't realize you wanted to be entertained.
I'm laughing so hard right now.
I make bad jokes. Ha ha ha ha ha!!!!! XD!
Oh, jeez. *Wipes tears of laughter from eyes.*
Okay, moving on.
I felt a little upset for a few minutes and I even planned a revenge plot that involved a binder full of threatening messages and then I decided, who the heck cares?
But I did realize something:
It's amazing what you can learn about yourself by listening to insults from jocks. I feel like I'm on a journey to self-awareness! I am an ugly b**** who makes bad jokes.
HA.

So guess what

Have you ever met someone very, very sweet who goes out with someone who is a TOTAL JERK?! Guess what... it's my first time seeing one of these cases today.
And it's kind of a strange sight...
Listen to this:
I'm sitting on a bench. AE leans over to me and says, "Can you believe MK is going out with BC?"
MK is going out with BC?!??? When did this happen?
"MK is going out with BC?!??? When did this happen?" I ask.
"Yeah, you didn't know that? Woooow, Sofia."
Yup, I'm pretty isolated from the outside world, aren't I.
"But MK is so... nice."
"I know! BC is like such a jerk. He doesn't deserve MK. But they've liked each other since last year and they told each other in February but they didn't go out until last week. MK was getting really fed up."
"But MK is so... nice."
"I know, Sofia," AE says, obviously impressed with my wit and intellect.
So I look over at MK. She is gardening with other classmates and pulling invasive plants out of the ground. Doing good for the world. Then I look over at BC. He's having a food fight with other guys at the picnic bench and dumping trash on the ground. I hope he picks that up...
"But MK is so... nice."
AE is fed up with my amazing verbal skills. She gets up and leaves me alone on the bench with my cheese sandwich. DZ is still on the bench with me, but he gets up a second later. Everyone loves me today. I take a big bite of my sandwich and continue watching the large contrast and mulling over the fact that opposites attract.
But why? Why would MK like BC?
Apparently, AE asked her. To which MK replied, "I am so sick of people telling me that we shouldn't go out." It was hard to register that MK was angry because she's so... nice.
Oh well. I start on my chocolate bar and itch my face. I've fallen face-first in stinging nettle (an invasive species somewhat like poison ivy) and some of it got up my nose. Greeeaaat. I have an itch on the inside of my nose.